NEW LOVER BOY ON THE BLOCK – hardly, but it’s a good feeling!
The World Cup is now in full swing and summer is well on the way. It’s time to relax and look at the funnier and brighter side of life and to distance oneself from the boring cut and thrust of the wailing and howling that local politics have been reduced to.
Down through the realms of history there have been many great male lovers who have made their mark on romance, a whole catalogue.
Perhaps the greatest all-time was Giacomo Girolamo Casanova born in Venice in 1725, a seasoned and crafty seducer of women with a string of never-ending conquests that earned him the title of “the womaniser”. He had a multi-muddled history, mixing with the nobility and major clerics as well as other classes where attractive women were concerned. He was also an author and writer.
Unfortunately, there was a dark side too and if he was around today he would be instantly arrested and jailed for life for being a pedophile as his conquests included young girls including one of nine (offered by her mother) and buying a 12-year-old Russian girl for his sexual pursuits. He is also known to have invented condoms or “protective caps” as he called them.
Lord Byron (the man who hated and maligned Valletta) was another “womaniser” with a string of affairs and conquests.
The arrival of the cinema really set the ball rolling first with the silent films and then the “talkies” and the first front-runner was Rudolph Valentino who caused his female cinema admirers to have fluttering hearts and romantic dreams.
Down through the 20th century, the “heart-throbs” continued to pile up with the appearance of stars like Clarke Gable, Cary Grant, Rock Hudson, Burt Lancaster, Elvis Presley and more contemporary Sean Connery and George Clooney (that’s him in the picture – NOT me!).
Well, all these are set to be joined by another – ME!
Among yesterday’s emails I found no less than three love proposals.
The first was from Stella who wrote:
“Hello my dear man! I apologize for the knowledge of the language! I often see you. You probably do not understand where and how I could see you. Therefore, I will tell you more about this. My work colleague lives near you. I often visit her. You liked me very much like a man. But I did not dare to approach you. I often think about you. I decided to write to you.”
Another was from Zlata:
“Hey. My name is Zlata. I'm a beautiful and sexy girl. At the moment I'm in your city, not far from your house! I often see you! I really like you. I want to see you and have sex!”
As if Stella and Zlata were not enough to be getting on with, a third followed from Anna:
“Hello my favourite and most desired! How are you? How is your mood? All is well? I am very pleased to write you my letter! I decided a long time to do it. I hope for your understanding! Perhaps now you are asking yourself who I am? Do not worry! Now I'll try to explain everything to you. My name is Anna. I am 33 years old. I'm not married and I do not have a young man.”
These opening words were all followed by lengthy descriptions of the type of sex we will have. The three stressed they are NOT asking for money but in fact want to GIVE me money for my services – of course on condition I give them my details and my Bank Account Number.
I receive about a dozen of these every week.
So, there you have it Mr George Clooney & Co – eat your hearts out! Not bad going for a 72-year-old man who can only climb two flights of stairs with difficulty and who nowadays dozes off while watching a football match!
Technology and the Internet have opened a whole new world for me. I receive countless emails about my unknown relatives who went to live in Nigeria, Senegal, Burkina Faso, and Cameroun and all over the world. All sadly died and left millions of dollars for me to inherit. All I have to do is give them my Bank Account Number!
Other letters tell me that I am a man who can be trusted. Their father or uncle or brother died and left millions of dollars which are being held by an Attorney because of their Government restrictions. However, if I give my Bank Account Number the money can be transferred to my account and I will be allowed to retain one million dollars.
I normally reply to such letters by stating I have passed them on to Police HQ in Malta and Europol for further verification. Funnily enough, after that I do not hear anything further!
Yes, a whole New World has been opened. What one has to do is keep eyes wide open and not be lured into money traps.
Continue to enjoy the World Cup!
ALBERT JEROME FENECH
